The first time I drowned

Before I get to the gist of what this blog is all about. let me pay homage, respect and
dues to the best dad ever, my mom. Not forgetting about the pen and the page, the only weapons I posses, mightier than the sword, more deadly than a loaded gun. Let’s take aim.


You don’t need to be at sea to drown in brine. A teardrop caressing your cheek bones, streaming down the contours of your face, finding a reservoir in your taste buds. And the choking starts, a voice suppressed, ghost like even, rise from the hollows in your ch chest.  And you drown in a whirlpool of your own tears. It’s unmanly to cry, but you cry still.  
Perhaps tears were meant to flood your optics so that you may see, with clarity in life’s bleak moments. When friends your walk in darkness and days fade into obscurity,  your eyes turns into wells bearing brine to sanctify the air, and quench the thirst of reason. I would reach out to fallen friends and mend them, to make us see days defeated.
Cascading down tear rips you apart with with bullets, that opens forever and eternity unchanging in the face of, in respite, despite prevailing circumstance life is left to the living.

When my mother died, the moon bathed the landscape in eery colours that night. Every shadow looked creepy, but no shadow formed could ever prosper against the hurt I felt. The thought of my little brother haunted me, a little boy who lost a mother at the tender age of eleven and a father at one. my little brother will never know a mother’s love.

That night, I wish i could have crawled back, into the womb that gave birth to me when I still had a chance. When the white rod of burning reality, hit you right in the middle of the eye, tongue tied you speak only in murmurs and abated breaths. You stare right into the throng of things but you hardly see a thing. When I ingested the honey coated titbits; “Ha hoa hlaha se sa hlaheng. Tsheliseha mokuena.”, they rise up my spine ans come back spewing vomit with bitterness.

If I had a say on what the future might hold, if heaven forbids burdens and pains were to be shared mine would seem less greater than you thought. It is because it its, and you will realize that mine was lowered into the ground of failed dreams and despair. How i wish one day when heaven have it’s roll- call, you name will be called out. The grim reaper walked in the vicinity of the ambition you had of me.


This entry was posted in Uncategorized and tagged , , . Bookmark the permalink.

One Response to The first time I drowned

  1. Motolinyane says:

    May Her soul rest in peace!

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )


Connecting to %s